Why can’t it be just different than usual?

I have to close my eyes
Every night.
And do it every night.
Why can’t I keep them open
And sleep and dream
Every second?
I have to do everything
Right every time.
And do it all the time.
Why can’t I do things
Wrong and have no cries
And guilts for every one?

Scared

First time in my life
I am scared!
Scared in a way,
I have never been before!
First time I think,
What if…
First time in my life
My hands are shaky!
Shaky in a way,
They have never been before!
First time I feel,
What if…
This is so weird,
To feel this way.
I have never been
On the other side before!
And I am scared.